Weddings in Haryana have changed a lot over the years. DJ nights, designer lehengas and big marriage halls are common now. But some old rituals have not gone anywhere. Families still follow them with the same seriousness, whether the wedding is in a village or in a city.
Here are 10 rituals that make a Haryanvi wedding what it is.
1. Haryanvi Wedding Rituals: Bhaat Neota
Before the wedding, the mother goes to her parental home to invite her brother personally. This is called Bhaat Neota. On the wedding day, the maternal uncle arrives with his family, gifts and jewellery. Until he completes this Bhaat ritual, the main ceremony does not move forward. It is one of the most emotional parts of the whole wedding.
2. Haryanvi Wedding Rituals: Baan Baithna
A few days before the wedding, the bride or groom sits for Baan. Oil and ubtan, made from turmeric, besan and sandalwood, are applied daily. Women of the house sit together during this time and sing old Haryanvi folk songs. It is as much a family gathering as it is a beauty ritual.
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3. Haryanvi Wedding Rituals: Chak Pooja
Women from the house visit the local potter before the wedding, singing songs on the way. They worship the potter’s wheel and bring home a clay pot as part of the rituals. This custom shows how closely Haryanvi weddings are tied to local craft and community.
4. Haryanvi Wedding Rituals: Ghudchadi
Before the baraat leaves, the groom wears his sehra and sits on a decorated horse for Ghudchadi. His bhabhi puts surma in his eyes, and he gives her money as shagun. After this, the groom stops at the village khera to pay respect before heading out.
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5. Haryanvi Wedding Rituals: Khodiya for Women
While the baraat is away, the women at the groom’s house stay up all night for Khodiya. They act out the roles of the bride and groom, dance and joke around freely. Men are not allowed to be part of this. It is one of the few rituals that belongs only to the women of the house.
6. Haryanvi Wedding Rituals: When Groom Returns Home
When the groom brings his bride home, his sisters stand at the door and stop them from entering. They only step aside once he pays a shagun of their choosing. This ritual is full of teasing and laughter between the sisters and the new bride.
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7. Haryanvi Wedding Rituals: Thapa Lagana
The mother-in-law welcomes the bride at the door with tilak and aarti. The bride then dips her hands in a turmeric mix and presses her handprints on the main wall of the house. This is called Thapa, and it marks the bride’s entry as a sign of good fortune for the home.
8. Haryanvi Wedding Rituals: Muh Dikhai Ceremony
Once the bride is inside, women from the family and neighbourhood gather for Munh Dikhai. Elders lift her veil to see her face and bless her with jewellery or cash. This is usually the first time the wider family and village women meet the bride up close.
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9. Haryanvi Wedding Rituals: Kangan Game
During the wedding, the bride and groom wear a thread called kangan on their wrist. Once home, a plate filled with water, milk and rose petals is placed in front of them, with a ring and coins hidden inside.
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Both take turns dipping their hand in to find the ring, and people say whoever finds it more times will have the upper hand in married life. After the game, they finish by untying each other’s kangan, which usually turns into a fun little challenge with the whole family watching.
10. Haryanvi Wedding Rituals: Brother-in-Law’s Lap
In this sweet family ritual, the groom’s younger brother (dever) stands at the front, followed by the bride, then the groom, and the mother right at the back, all holding on to each other in a line. As part of this moment, the bhabhi gives a gift to her dever, marking the start of their bond as sister-in-law and brother-in-law.
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Haryanvi Wedding Rituals
Big venues and modern setups have become part of every Haryanvi wedding now. But these rituals are still the heart of it. They are the moments that bring the whole family together and keep the old traditions alive.
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